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Heartbreak and Renewal

My heart is sore today and I’m embracing it instead of running from the pain. Sometimes this happens and the most productive thing for me to do is to look inward and ask myself “what are you thinking and what are you feeling?” Once I know my thoughts, I am better able to understand my feelings. I am hurting today because I worry that I will end up alone. I am sad because I don’t want to live my life without a partner who gets me. I’m not under the delusion that there will be a man who gets me all the time; that person simply doesn’t exist. The concept of a romantic partner who understands you 100 percent of the time is like a unicorn or another mythological creature.

You don’t understand you 100 percent of the time, so finding someone who gets you all the time is an irrational expectation. What you can find is someone who compliments you and is able to accept you for who you are and love you to the best of their ability. In turn, you will love that person as deeply and passionately as you can. You will fight and find flaws in one another. You will cry when you don’t feel understood, and then you find a way to work through that pain and come together again. I believe that sort of connection is out there for all of us, and that’s not a hyperbole. I want to meet a man who knows what the word “hyperbole” means both in math and in English. I also happen to love the word parabola and there is someone out there who appreciates my love of random words; I know there is.

There is a man out there for me and honestly, I hope that that man is someone I’ve already met; I’ll leave the rest to your imagination.

I want to share my life with someone and there is nothing wrong with that. I could argue this point from a biological perspective and assert that human beings are social animals, but ultimately I don’t fucking care about that. I care about being in a warm all-encompassing embrace.

And sure, not every relationship is perfect. We need to work hard on our partnerships to make long-lasting healthy relationships. So, I want the opportunity to do that with a man and I am not ashamed to admit that to myself and others.

If you’re out there reading this and you want to have a romantic partner, I support your pursuit of happiness.

Love is a wonderful part of life; you deserve to be loved and so do I.