I resent my sensitivity but now…

//I resent my sensitivity but now…

I resent my sensitivity but now…

We can’t change who we are. We are born, we develop our personalities as we grow up from children to adults. I’m not an early childhood development specialist, but I do know that. I was once a child, grew into a teenager and I’ve become something like an adult. Throughout this journey, I’ve identified as a sensitive human being. It’s been a rocky road (not like the ice cream by the way). I did not choose the brain I have, but I can learn to work with it. I’ve often wished that wasn’t so sensitive. Part of the reason is that people have “sensitive shamed” me. What that means is that they’ve said things like “you’re so sensitive!” And guess what? I am fucking sensitive and I’m embracing that. It enriches my life and even strangers understand that. Speaking of strangers understanding shit, check out this BetterHelp article. People I don’t know well have seen me cry on the subway and they’ve either ignored it or they’ve been strangely supportive. I have vague memories of both women and men asking if I was okay. And though I wasn’t objectively “okay,” sadness is a part of life. Crying is cathartic and I believe we can collectively agree that shedding tears helps us to get our emotions out.

My sensitivity makes me a better writer, my sensitive nature allows me to help other people by empathizing with them. My sensitivity is a gift from God or whatever universal force is out there that put me on this earth. No one will take this quality from me and for the rest of my life, I will learn to value this attribute of my personality. I will work to be a better person and integrate my emotionality into my being. I will not be “sensitive shamed.” But I realize that it’s up to me to monitor this. I have a right to express myself the way I feel comfortable doing so. There are people who repress their emotions, there are other human beings who are more logical than emotional. These people coexist with me in the world and their experiences are just as “real” as mine.

The more I can believe in myself, the richer my life will me. Sure, there are days that my sensitivity and emotionality frustrates me. There are times when I’m frustrated that I feel things more deeply than say a logical person. There’s another thing I need to clarify; just because I am sensitive doesn’t mean I am “crazy” or “irrational.” I have the capacity to express myself in a logical manner. Being sensitive and logical are not mutually exclusive.

What about you? Do you identify as more sensitive than logical? I want to hear how you cope with life’s challenges. Are you more logical than sensitive or the other way around? Maybe you’re a combination of both. As a good friend of mine said: life is not for the timid. We have a choice as to how we cope with things. So, how do you express yourself?


By | 2017-07-28T18:13:07+00:00 July 28th, 2017|Uncategorized|0 Comments

About the Author:

Sarah Fader is the CEO and Founder of Stigma Fighters, a non-profit organization that encourages individuals with mental illness to share their personal stories. She has been featured in The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Atlantic, Quartz, Psychology Today, The Huffington Post, HuffPost Live, and Good Day New York.

Leave A Comment